not alone
by Katnissmokingjay
Summary: His eyes harden in anger. Mine flash in determination. He is not coming. I don't want him there. In my house. Spending my winnings. Drinking my liqueur. Ruining my family. Again. mentions of rape, miscarriage, abuse, strong violence and swearing.
1. Chapter 1- goodbye

Chapter 1

I look into his eyes. Brown. Cold. Unforgiving. I'm not letting him come.

"Lily, Daisy, Rose, Freesia, Prim, April, Lucas, Andrew and Mum can come. Sorry you're not coming David. I won. I can take who I want. I don't want you coming with us."

"You little worthless whore-"

"Don't you dare say that in front of a 10 year old, you pig."

His eyes harden in anger. Mine flash in determination. _He is not coming. I don't want him there. In my house. Spending my winnings. Drinking my liqueur. Ruining my family._ **Again** _._

He tries to swing at me. I duck and kick him in the stomach.

"Ok guys go and pack your belongings in the bags under the bathroom sink. I will deal with this."

Lily, Daisy and Rose usher them all up stairs and mum trails behind giving me a look that says don't-get-hurt.

"You little bitch. what the fuck! Where the hell did you learn that? Why the fuck would you do that to me you little slut?"

"In case you've forgotten I just won the hunger games. And I am the youngest to ever win"

* * *

We all forward out of the little 2 bedroom house. Our small possessions packed neatly in 3 old suitcases. We make our way to the victor's village where our new life begins. I cant wait to get away from that dreadful house. that place holds too many bad memories. _The beatings. Being raped again and again, listening to mum suffering through miscarriages, nightmares coming true._

 _I am Katniss Everdeen. 12 years old. The youngest winner of the 70th hunger games. Forth in sixteen children. Eight are dead. My father is dead. David is my step-father. He abused us. Raped my sisters. Raped me. He only cared for my brothers. It's not their fault. It's his._ **He will pay. He will burn in hell.**

An excited squealing rips me from my brooding thoughts. Prim and April are running ahead of us all jumping and squealing about moving into a new house and having more than 2 bedrooms, while holding that damned cat. _Buttercup. I should have k1illed it while I had the chance. But then I can never take something away from my baby sisters that they love._

"I have just realised that we will have Haymitch as a neighbour now. Agrrrrhhhhhhh." I groan. _great. just great. I have to put up with Haymitch now._

"Who is Haymitch?" Freesia asks.

"He is my drunk mentor that helped me in the games. You know the one that fell of stage?"

"Oh okay. He is funny." Freesia giggles.

Haymitch Abernathy. Winer of the 50th hunger games. Drunk because that's how he deals with it. I haven't found a way to deal with it yet. I will soon enough.


	2. Chapter 2- nightmare

**chapter 2- nightmares**

"Katniss" a whispering voice says at the end of my bed.

"Yes Primmy"

"I had a bad dream. Can I sleep in your bed?"

"Sure"

Prim snuggles into my side seeking my warmth. She rests her golden head on my shoulder. Her thin arms wrapping around my waist as she falls into a dreamless sleep. I close my eyes and hope to keep my nightmares at bay for the sake of Prim who doesn't need my screams waking her up.

I have had nightmares since I was 7 when my dad died. I dreamt about him exploding in the mines. Then when mum married David I had even worse nightmares. I have more nightmares now than ever. the Hunger Games. Killing innocent children.

 _He raped me when mum was working and Lily, Daisy and Rose were all at school and Freesia, Prim, April, Roxanne, Timmy and Cate were in the yard._ _I was 8. Two weeks after mum married him. And he raped me. I was the last one he touched though. He didn't touch anyone other than Lily, Daisy, Rose and me. We were his favourite toys._

 _I won't forget how he got drunk and beat Roxanne so badly she had internal bleeding and eventually died from her injuries. We buried her in the meadow next to baby Emily who was miscarried because David kicked mum in the stomach so the last baby of dads would die._

 _Timmy and Cate were the cutest little twins that mum had had next to Prim and Freesia. They both were found dead in our only bathroom. They both had been abused and stabbed several times and left to bleed out. On my 9th birthday I walked into the bathroom and found them lying in the bathtub dead and bloody. They were only 3. Roxanne was 4._

All gone in 2 years. Mum was so distraught. She had miscarried 5 times. She was punished 3/5times because they were little boys. I feel bad for mum. Loosing 8 kids.

"Kitty?"

"Yea Sia?"

"Can April and I sleep in your bed with you and Primmy?"

"Of course little ones. Jump in"

Sia and April both snuggle into me and my blankets.

I look at the clock and see that it's only ten. God can this night go on any longer?


End file.
